


it doesnt really matter how high i climb without you

by lukastealeaf



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: M/M, a little angsty but it ends happy, idk if this is even good ok, this is all prose my dudes, v taako centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-03
Updated: 2017-11-03
Packaged: 2019-01-28 19:40:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12613972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lukastealeaf/pseuds/lukastealeaf
Summary: how does a home exist when youve never earned it ((a look back at an empty life))





	it doesnt really matter how high i climb without you

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by our chat group prompt "home" i think this works idk title inspired by [i guess i] missed you from the spongebob musical ((dont @me its good))

home  
what a funny word a baseless concept something you dont think youve ever understood will ever understand  
a place that you belong a place  
when have you ever felt that  
house to house place to place tossed around like some dirty worthless piece of meat  
just a commodity to show that they cared about something other than themselves  
it didnt stick  
it never stuck  
for years you wondered why  
why didnt anyone want you why didnt anyone love you  
your aunt was the only one who actually loved you cared for you wanted you  
the only one where you thought maybe  
this was home

it didnt last  
of course it didnt  
you and home are polar opposites far away never to connect 

when you try again its a cooking show someone at your side who loves you  
youre doing something you love  
((you remember your aunts warm hands guiding you teaching you all her cooking secrets and god the whole in your chest gets bigger you miss her so much))  
it was good so good you were happy  
you were happy in a way youd never thought youd feel again and you thought maybe  
this is home

you shouldnt have been surprised when you were wrong  
you got to cocky  
forgot the world cant allow you to be happy  
to have a home

years pass and you get used to the solitude  
you travel far and extensively  
never settling long enough to feel that emptiness

then it happens  
you meet him  
hes warm and friendly and you almost dislike him instantly  
((youre a liar youve always been a liar saying you never minded the solitude saying youre glad theres no one to cook for that you love travelling that you dont miss your aunt))  
he never treats with disregard even though your ice has cut him over and over ((youre too sharp and hes too soft you need to leave before you lacerate him))  
too late you realize youre attached to him  
you cant leave anymore  
you have friends  
friends  
in some strange twist of fate  
theres a kid that looks up to you and you would die for him ((poor precious angus how did he get caught up in you))

and magnus  
somehow along the way  
you fell in love with him  
something you never thought never even allowed to happen  
throughout wonderland  
he was so strong ((far stronger than you could ever be ever hope to be))  
you admired him so much ((you have since the day you met him hes always been selfless and strong and beautiful and you realize youve been in love with him for so long ((you still dont know how long its really been but when you do it all makes sense))))

then your world falls apart again  
in a way much different than you ever expected  
hes still there  
by your side ((as you point your wand at someone you believed to your friend ((she took them from you she took lup from you how could you forget lup))))

then shes back shes back your precious sister ((the reason youve never had a home is because she was your home shes always been your home god how could you forget her))  
and magnus is still warm and smiling and by your side ((sometimes you wonder why hes never left but hes loyal and you dont want him to leave))  
and all your friends  
all your friends are there and with you and they wont leave ((even lucretia who youd forgive over and over again ((who did all she did out of fear and love))))  
and you think

this is home  
isnt it

**Author's Note:**

> thank u for reading im p sure this isnt good but whatever also shout out to google docs for making me go back and de-capitalize everything ((and obvs all u in my chat group and lex for the prompt i love yall!!!)
> 
> hit me up at kurururugisuzaku.tumblr.com if u wanna talk about taz or anime or video games


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